Tom and Jerry

Monday, July 10, 2006 ' 4:00 AM

My life my BB 64th Company.. my true feeling are here!!

My sec1 life in Boys' Brigade 64th coy is fun at rare times and lonely at most of the time. Me and PC sometimes fight over a free kick in a foot ball game, we also fight for almost everything. I can say that without him my life would be very grey and dull. well jus a blink of an eye, we were holdin our LCP post! I felt very happy, no amount of words can explain this feeling.. There were many booboos along the way.. Once i stood at the SM's place which is behind the rest of the company.. As blurr as usual, they asked me to go back to join wif the rest of them. that time the SM who is now our BB officer told me " one day u will stand here dun worry!! " i was like orhz ok"
But givin out a fake feelin and knowin inside that tomy and PC is better then me, i felt veri hurt veri lost and veri sad! i just felt like crying but lookin around there was no1 to give me his shoulder.. haiiz!! TSK TSK!! No amount of words can explain this feelin inside me.. haiiz!!

At my sec 2 BB life its again another sad year.. Full of saddness and depresions! No one can understand me real feeling! they said leave no man behind but they are already leaving me behind!! I really dun understand that y they keep callin ourself " Band of brothers " when they dun even understand me?? Y ish that so? even the easiest thing in BB they also left me out which is games, they die also dowan to pass to me the ball!! I jus dun get it.. TSK.. During E.N.D i was being promoted again now ish to CPL!! I was really happy for that few seconds But soon after, i jus got sad again as usual! goin to the end of the year, i fell into deep depression which no one cares! day by day, it grew worse and worse! Soon i started to cut my risk! After cuttin, i do not even feel the physical pain at all.. den after one or two weeks later, my depression gotten over me. I started to get all F***ed up! I hide myself up and started to punch the walls until my hand was bleeding but then again, i dun feel the physical hurt.. I ask myself again, Y no one care about me? I talked to staff Zee about my feelings, den for once I felt some1 in the company really care about me! I felt so touched until i cried non- stop.. I jus felt my ASL post was to heavy on me! From the day that Staff Zee really ease me out, i hab regarded and respected him as my kor in other words, my big brother! haiz..

At my sec3 BB life, It was rather stressful and sad and a pinch of happiness.. I was too sad to even smile at the officers but i tried to hide it infront of my fello cadets because i wanna show how manly i am, as the sayin goes real man dun cry! I endured and endured jus waiting for the day i got my SL post!! The gul that i used to like told me not to quit so promising her, i staied in the BB! Finally The stay over at St. Margret sec or SMSS for short, i really felt so nice.. as my sideburn was long, Mr.Lim asked me to cut my hair. after cuttin, it look wierd Mr.Lim laughed at me!! This was the time i felt that i was in paradise!! This was the first time in three years in my BB life he laughed at me! No amount of my words can explain this nice feelin that i have been waiting for! its like arhz so nice!! In short SHIOK!! haiiz.. Now the Gb gulz and I wanted to do PD again.. and so i got this kinda of feelin that gives me the push fight for a chance to do PD!! after givin PC and Roymond this idea, they donnoe our feelin its like so sad lorhz when they jus sae i strongly dun agree.. Den for that few days i felt very depressed and low! I did not had my dinner and lunch for like 3 days.. I dun take my breakfast so its like 3 days i did not eat la!! I jus felt so useless and hopeless lor! Haiiz.......
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The worst thing in my BB life is the officers council!!! haiiz.. i am really that hopeless and useless!! haiiz

Tom&Jerry are loved :D